A Man’s Car Breaks Down In Front Of A Monastery…
Funny Joke Of The Day
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him and even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the Earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the Earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232,049 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,702,382 sand pebbles on the Earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door and turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.Tell us what you thought of this funny joke in the comments below, and come back every day for the Funny Joke Of The Day!
(Here’s where we found this funny joke.)Capitol Hill Receives Money Order By Airmail
What is a Gyro Copter ?
Well Ladies, Gentlemen and Homeland Security Secretary, Jeh Johnson … a Gyro Copter is essentially a flying bicycle … a flying bicycle that, for instance, could literally be flown under the radar and landed on the lawn of Capitol Hill by a disgruntled postman ( there’s a first ).
And that, if you haven’t heard, is exactly what 61 year old Doug Hughes of Tampa, Florida did on Wednesday April 15 at 1.20 pm to deliver 535 letters to the 535 members of Congress.
“This Is Not Good People!”,
you might say … and so it would seem. … But, Doug Hughes was planning an act of civil disobedience not an act of terrorism. He wanted to highlight that in both houses there are only 2 representatives who have raised the majority of their campaign funding from small donations of no more than $200. Stating in his letters, “I’m demanding reform and declaring a voter’s rebellion in a manner consistent with Jefferson’s description of rights in the Declaration of Independence. As a member of Congress, you have three options. !. You may pretend corruption does not exist. 2. You may pretend to oppose corruption while you sabotage reform. 3. You may actively participate in real reform.”
Radical Stuff
But it appears that Doug Hughes has turned out to be a soft spoken, calm man whose intentions weren’t exactly a secret. He was even interviewed by the Secret Service on October 5, 2013, openly admitting that he owned a gyrocopter and that he did want to do something big to draw attention to campaign finance reform but had no intention to crash into any buildings or monuments in DC.
Hughes also informed to the Tampa Bay Times, last year ( after which the Secret Service contacted him again ) about the stunt and why he felt he must go through with it, saying that he had no intention of hurting anybody. Before Hughes took off he sent an email about his plan to [email protected], while the Tampa Bay Times posted a story about the event at noon that day and had a report call the Secret Service by 1 pm to make sure they were aware of what was transpiring.
Your Mail Maybe Delayed Up To 4 Years
No, not because it needs to pass through Congress. 4 years is the combined prison time Hughes could be facing for violating national defense airspace and for flying an unregistered aircraft without a pilot’s licence. To Hughes, however, this was not so bad as the very real concern that he might be blown out of the air … a result he was not keen on but prepared to risk saying, “I have also thought about being 80 years old and watching the collapse of this country and thinking that I had an idea once that might have arrested the fall and didn’t do it.”
Jets
Aside from bring attention to the issue of money in politics, Hughes has inadvertently highlighted another major problem with Washington. Namely, that a mailman can fly a bicycle almost all the way up to the White House and, as yet, we don’t know whether authorities had a plan in place to stop such an eventuality.
Imagine if instead of mailman, Doug Hughes, that the protest had been made by an angry dairy farmer with 535 bags of milk to throw, Congress would have stunk … and no one would have known the difference.
Certainly, it has come to light that had jets even been in the air over Washington they would likely have been ineffective against such a small slow moving target.
Of course the New York Jets have taken issue with this but that same evening failed to stop a local mailman in a Gyro Copter from defeating them 31 points to 7.
In conclusion I don’t know whether to praise or criticize Doug Hughes … but I do want to know where my birthday cards are. I mean “C’mon!”, it’s been over a week.
How To Play Spades
Spades involves four players who play as fixed pairs. To choose a partner, the players will either select them in person or pick from a deck of cards. Once the partners have been selected, they will sit opposite each other during the game. Spades is played using a standard 52-card pack, with the spade suits always as a trump and cards ranking from the highest (ace) to the lowest (2). A record of the scores is kept every time either of the opposing teams records a win.
Understanding The Terminology of Spades
Before playing spades, there are several terms that a player should familiarize themselves with. Some of these words and phrases include:- Bid – this is a verbal declaration indicating the number of tricks each side intends to win
- Contract – an agreement to win a specified number of points in a round
- Follow suit – to play a card in the suit played first
- Lead – the play the first card of a trick
- Pass – a verbal declaration that a side will not make a bid
- Trick – a round of cards to be played, with each player placing one card
- Trump – a suit designated to be the highest ranking among all other suits
Prepare For The Game
- Dealing – The responsibility of the dealer is to distribute the deck among the players, one card after another. Each of the players will be required to draw a card as a way of determining who amongst them will deal first. As a general rule, the player who draws the highest card will be regarded as the dealer. The dealer will then deal each of the four players’ cards so that they have a total of 13 cards. The deal will then go round in a clockwise direction, with each subsequent player taking their turn for every new hand
- Bidding – Bidding begins from the player seated on the dealer’s left hand side and proceeds in a clockwise direction. Once the cards are distributed, each of the players surveys his cards and estimates the number of tricks they think they can win. Every participant is required to make a bid of at least one and cannot pass. Since spades are always trumps, no suit is named to be trumps. The sum total of tricks picked by members of the same side is known as a contract.
Playing Spades
For the first trick, the player seated to the left of the dealer cannot lead a spade. When the game takes a clockwise direction, all players must follow the suit led. If they are unable to follow the suit, they are allowed to play any card. Unless the led suit is a trump, a player will not have to play a trump. The highest card in the suit will win the trick provided a spade does not trump the trick. There are also instances where more than one trump will be played in one trick, resulting in the highest trump winning.- Rules about spades – In the event that spades are not the led suit, the rules allow for a spade to be played if the player has no cards in the led suit. There are two instances that allow for a spade to be led. This is when a spade has trumped a previous trick of a different suit or when spades are the only cards left in the hand. The player who wins a trick will lead the subsequent trick.
- Keeping a record of the scores – In order to make the process of keeping scores simple, the cards in a trick should be piled so that they remain visible to all the four players. This will allow the players to count them both during and after the game.
- Scoring – Before the game begins, the players should agree on the score that is required to win the game. While in most cases the score will be a multiple of 100, the custom is to place it at 500. Once a contract has been made between two partners, the score will be obtained by multiplying the number of tricks by the number 10. Scoring in a game of spades is quite an interesting phenomenon. Each of the tricks that a team wins above their contract is known as a sandbag. For every sandbag, one extra point is included in the score of the duo. However, failure to make the contract results in the team losing 10 points for every bid. This is designed to make the game more competitive.
- Sandbags – A game of spades has penalties for sandbags as a way of discouraging underbidding. When your sandbags add up to a total of ten, 100 points will be deducted to the total score of your team. In case your sandbags total to a figure over ten, the leftovers will begin a fresh count as they move towards ten.
Spades Tips and Variations
- Helpful tips – Although sandbags are designed to prevent underbidding, they also make the game more challenging. Since winning extra tricks will not help your team, the best thing to do would be to strive to have both the high and low cards in a suit. This means that you will have control over the winning or losing of a trick. By doing this, you will also control each round of the game.
- Variations – Different players can introduce creative rules in order to have a variation of a game of spades. One of the options is to have (2) ranking between the king and ace. All players can also agree, for the first trick, to put out their lowest club. This will change the strategies for playing and bidding since the high club will win the trick.
Spades Questions and Answers
Should I always play the highest of a trick?
There is an advantage that is usually associated with being the last player in any given trick. This is because it gives you the opportunity to view all the cards that have been played. In the long run, you will be in a great position to determine how to play appropriately.When the highest of a trick is played, what are my options?
In a game of spades, middle cards are usually regarded as dangerous. These cards cannot be relied upon to take tricks but can take bags at the tail end of the game. You should go with the middle cards first if majority of the tricks are kings or aces, before dumping the lower cards. However, betting on queens and jacks may require that you keep middle cards.Can I play a low card in trumping?
Yes. However, it is important to remember that another player can play a higher spade. This is why it is better to use middle spades in trumping.The IRS Decided To Audit Grandpa And Summoned Him To The IRS Office…
Funny Joke Of The Day
The IRS decided to audit Grandpa and summoned him to the IRS Office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS finds that believable.” “I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,” said Grandpa. “How about a demonstration?” The auditor thought for a moment and said, “Okay. Go ahead.” Grandpa said, “I’ll bet you $1,000 that I can bite my own eye.” The auditor thought a moment and said, “It’s a bet.” Grandpa removed his glass eye and bit it. The auditor’s jaw dropped. Grandpa said, “Now, I’ll bet you $2,000 that I can bite my other eye.” Well, the auditor could tell that Grandpa definitely wasn’t blind, so he took the bet. Grandpa removed his dentures and bit his good eye. The stunned auditor then realized he had wagered and lost three grand, all with Grandpa’s attorney as a witness. He started to get nervous. “Want to go double or nothing?” Grandpa asked. “I’ll bet you $6,000 that I can stand on one side of your desk and pee into that wastebasket on the other side and never get a drop anywhere in between.” The auditor, twice burned, was cautious, but he looked carefully and decided there was no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agreed again. Grandpa stood beside the desk and unzipped his pants, but although he strained mightily, he couldn’t make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinated all over the auditor’s desk. The auditor leaped with joy, realizing that he had just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Grandpa’s own attorney moaned and put his head in his hands. “Are you okay?” the auditor asked. “Not really,” said the attorney. “This morning, when Grandpa told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me $25,000 that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you’d be happy about it.”Tell us what you thought of this funny joke in the comments below, and come back every day for the Funny Joke Of The Day!
(Here’s where we found this funny joke.)9 Funny Words That Start With B
These nine uproariously funny words that start with B will entertain and educate you. Really!
1. Bacchanal
Would you rather be called a drunk or a bacchanal? You know, if the title fit? I bet you chose bacchanal, because that word sounds like you’re the ruler of a castle or earl of the kingdom. The other word sounds like you’re lucky to have a job. If your child comes home from college with a bacchanal, say goodbye to your wine.2. Ballyhoo
The last thing you want to do when your child comes home with a drunk is to make a big ballyhoo. Just be cool! No shouting or ball-busting. Otherwise, you’ll have a Romeo and Juliet scenario going on, and you’ll just look like a barbarian who doesn’t understand true love.3. Bardolatry
Speaking of Shakespeare, bardolatry is the excessive idolatry of Shakespeare. Can you imagine such a thing? Do those people walk around speaking in Shakespearean English? “Wherefore art thou, Terrel? Dost thou desire a Mallowmar?”4. Barleycorn
Barleycorn is supposedly a unit of measurement equal to one-third of an inch long. But I only know it as a last name. John Barleycorn, or Caleb Barleycorn. If you ever change your name, you should certainly consider Barleycorn. People will know exactly what interests you, especially if you decide to change your profession to “ruler.”5. Bugger
A bugger can be a good thing or a bad thing. It really depends on what precedes it. “Piss off, you little bugger,” for instance, is pretty clearly an insult. But “you’re a charming little bugger” is a compliment, and you might even get a little smooch on the forehead, so congratulations! But the other one, you should probably find someone else to bug.6. Barack
Does anyone else in the entire world have this name? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?7. Baba
Now it’s just getting silly. Baba is baby talk for bottle. Or boob. Or grandma. Or baby. Not sure which. If adults walked around saying “baba” and reaching their arms out, it’s unlikely they would get any of those things. It’s more likely they would get bopped on the head.8. Babydoll
A babydoll in a child’s playroom is completely innocent. A babydoll in a clothing store is a nightgown. A babydoll in a casino is a floozy. A babydoll in a nightclub is a cocktail waitress. Does any word have more contradictory connotations than this? I think not. If you call a woman “babydoll,” it will be very revealing as to how she sees herself, whether she kisses you or slaps you. Try it and let me know what happens. I’m interested.9. Byssi
Ever had mussels? Ever seen fresh mussels? Particularly the part that’s hard to separate the mussel from the shell? That’s byssi. A busy mussel makes byssi so it doesn’t lose its home in the strong ocean currents. The mussel doesn’t need to worry about paying the tax man, but it does need to worry about “current seas.”How to Make Paper Airplanes
It’s a debate that will likely last until the end of time. What is the best way to make a paper airplane? Your dad taught you one way, and then your best friend taught you a different way when she was in that phase where she was constantly throwing paper airplanes at the teacher’s head to distract said teacher from assigning homework. It may have been an annoying phase, but you do have to thank her for the fact that you never had to do homework in the third grade.
Anyway, there are so many ways that you can fold a piece of paper so that it ends up being an aerodynamic wonder. But the following is a way that you probably never considered. In order to try this newfangled, ridiculously awesome way to make a paper airplane, you will need a few things:
- Paper
- Model airplanes
- Scissors
- Glue
- Colored markers
How to Make Paper Airplanes – Get to Know Your Prototype!
You have probably noticed that model airplanes made by companies look a lot more like actual airplanes than the paper airplanes that took nosedives into your PBJ sandwiches when you were in elementary school. Since you have learned to live in reality as an adult, shouldn’t the paper airplanes that you make as an adult reflect that reality? What you want to do is study and examine your model airplane as closely as you can, taking in every little detail. This isn’t just a folded up piece of paper, this is an actual airplane with wings and windows and probably some sort of logo. You want your paper airplane to look exactly like this model airplane if you can.How to Make Paper Airplanes – Paper Cutouts
After you have figured out and envisioned exactly how your paper airplane is going to look at the end, it’s time to cut out the pieces of paper that you will need in order to make this creation a reality. You should cut out a big enough piece of paper for the body of the plane, as well as additional pieces for the wings, wheels, and everything else that is on the exterior of the plane. If you think it will be difficult to cut up the paper in all the correct ways, you can bring in other things too! Feel free to use aluminum foil, pieces of plastic, moldy banana peels from the garbage, whatever it is that you can get your hands on that can help you make this paper airplane amazing! Just cut whatever it is up into the correct shapes to prepare for the next step.How to Make Paper Airplanes – Gluing Up Loose Ends
With all of your cutouts, you have all of the pieces of the puzzle. Now, it’s time to put them all together! Fold up all of your paper shapes in whatever ways you think they need to be folded up, glue them at the ends, and then glue all the pieces together! It might be hard to for some of the pieces to stay on, but that just means you have to use more glue. Dump glue all over the body of the airplane if that’s what it takes. If it takes a really long time to dry, well, that’s just the price that you have to pay for a really wonderful paper airplane!How to Make Paper Airplanes – Making It Look the Part
Now that everything is glued on, you want to make sure that your paper airplane looks as much like the model airplane as possible. That was the whole point of this entire project, right? You wanted to make a paper airplane that was more impressive than any of the pieces of paper you folded up as a child when your mother wouldn’t let you watch those cartoons about the talking teddy bear who was constantly on acid trips. It is very possible though that at this point, your paper airplane looks like a mess, with a huge mass of dried glue on top and everything from paper to aluminum foil to old banana peels composing its body. If this is the case, what you will need to do is alter it as much as you need to create a desirable final product. Chisel away at that dried glue, and dump some white paint on top of the moldy banana peels. When you’re all done with that, get those markers and draw on the window, logos, and everything else that is actually going to make it look like a real miniature airplane.How to Make Paper Airplanes – Fly, Fly, Fly!
This part was the magic of paper airplanes when you were a kid. You wouldn’t have folded up those pieces of paper if you weren’t looking forward to seeing them fly. So now you get to see if your most recent creation can become airborne! It can go one of three ways. 1. You made your paper airplane so realistic that when you throw it, it just continues to fly, and it flies away from you so you never get it back. You’ll miss it, but at least you get to be proud that you did your job so well that you created not only a paper airplane but a true airplane. 2. Just like the paper airplanes you made as a kid, it goes for a short distance and then takes a nosedive into the ground. Maybe not the ideal result, but you really couldn’t have expected much better. At least it looks more complicated than the paper airplanes you made as a kid. 3. That pile of crap falls right to the ground when you try to make it fly. And why wouldn’t it? Because of all of the things you put on it, it is so heavy that it is completely incapable of flight. But take heart! Even though making it fly may seem like the entire point of making a paper airplane, it isn’t. You got to have fun and learn, and that’s really all that counts. Whatever result you get, you will value and treasure the memories of making this astounding paper airplane for the rest of your life. And that will be its own reward.Household Uses For Glucose
What’s the first thing which comes to your mind when you hear the word “Glucose?” Diabetes! Well, glucose is much more than that. It is a great energy source used all over the world to get some instant energy or recharge the energy levels in the body. But the word glucose may sound a bit scary to you because you have seen the doctors putting glucose into your grandma’s body with needles. Don’t worry! That’s not the only way to get glucose in your body; neither is glucose used only to gain energy. So, if you have some spare glucose powder in your home and you are needing a pick-me-up, you can put that glucose to good use.
Winning the Race
Let me guess, you have a crush on some sweet girl in your class. And just when you were about to let her know how you’re feeling, your romantic rival interfered. He challenged you to a race and the winner gets to woo the girl. But, you are a bit slow runner compared to him. How to beat him and win the girl? Take some glucose just before the start of the race. Glucose not only provides you with energy, but also starts to burn the fat in your body and give it a little more oxygen. With so many chemical reactions going on inside your body, you will become like a battery from the outside and may be able to complete the race a second faster than usual. I hope that is enough for you to win the race and the girl.Win the Spicy Meal Challenge
Glucose has a sweet taste. So, why not put into good use and cheat a little bit? Eat a good amount of glucose before sitting in a spicy meal eating competition. The glucose will get converted into sugar after some time and with so much sweetness already inside your body, how can anyone beat you now? Eat all the spice you want now and you won’t be feeling any heat or burning inside your body, because glucose has this COVERED. Smart! No?Fool Your Parents
Answer honestly! If I put two containers in front of you; one containing salt and one containing sugar, would you be able to tell the difference without tasting it? No! Nice way to trick people, isn’t it now? So, next time you are in the kitchen with your mom and she is preparing something salty but you like sweet better. Trick your mom and change the container of salt with the glucose one. Your mom wouldn’t found out about it (it’s a 40 – 60 chance when it comes to mothers; they are pretty cunning) and you will have your dish as sweet as you like it.Win a Boxing Match
When it comes to boxing, it’s all about stamina more than strength. So, if you are in a boxing match and want to hold an upper hand over your opponent, instead of using some drug and risk the chances of getting disqualified and shamed, use glucose. As everybody knows, glucose is an awesome source of energy. So drink some glucose water and feel super charged before your boxing match. Then go ahead and ram your opponent in front of your crush to impress her. I bet you never knew glucose can help you in so many ways to impress your girl! Did you?Beach Towels For When You Love the Ocean, But You Also Love Food
It’s Spring Break around these parts, so we thought we’d track down some sweet beach towels for all your ocean/pool/bathtub/puddle fun. What’s something we love even more than the beach? FOOD! Because food makes pretty much everything better. Here are a few of our favorite food beach towels, including this amazing Tortilla Towel.
Top 3 Reasons you Need a Tortilla Towel
- Your friends already call you “Chipotle.”
- You’ve always wanted to snuggle with a doggy burrito.
- Lay down tortilla towel. Lie on top of tortilla towel. Cover up with second tortilla towel. Instant tostada.
Burrito Blanket, Be a Giant Human Burrito, Tortilla Towel
out of stock
Amazon.com
as of April 23, 2024 12:27 pm
Features
- THE ORIGINAL Burrito Blanket that started the craze on Reddit
- PRINTED ON BOTH SIDES: Super soft and plush tortilla blanket, keeps you warm during winter months
- IT'S GIANT! 5 feet diameter, roll yourself up or with a friend
- HEMMED EDGES for comfort and a nice finishing touch
- FUN AT PARTIES, the beach, picnics, camping or just lounging on the couch
Features
- This extra, crispy Bacon Towel is well done and ready to wrap around you like a living pig in a blanket.
- The Bacon Towel makes a sizzling gift for any bacon lover.
- Measures a full 72-inches by 26-inches.
- 100% Cotton
Pizza Towel - round beach towel with pepperoni print
out of stock
Amazon.com
as of April 23, 2024 12:27 pm
Features
- Pepperoni Pizza print - oversized ROUND towel
- Ships in an actual Pizza Box
- Great unusual gift idea
- 100% cotton
- Perfect for the beach, bath, or picnics
Watermelon Towel - round beach towel with watermelon print
out of stock
Amazon.com
as of April 23, 2024 12:27 pm
Features
- Material: Polyester
- Size: approx. 150*150cm
- Not not just a gorgeous beach blanket! Use it for an outdoor park picnic, a yoga & meditating mat, a beautiful indoor/outdoor throw, a towel to relax on, a décor piece, a wall hanging, a tablecloth & more
- 100% brand new and high quality
- Washing Instruction - Gentle Hand Wash Separately In Cold Water Only
6 Funny Words That Start With K
Ever look at a letter so long that it starts to look a little weird? For example, stare at the letter K. Keep staring until we say you can stop. Keep going, what are you looking here for? Okay, that was probably long enough. Now check out these six things that start with K.
1. Kerfuffle
Used primarily in uptight British social circles, kerfuffle means “commotion.” As in, “I say, those seven headless horsemen are causing quite a kerfuffle, aren’t they dear?”2. Killjoy
There is perhaps no worse insult on the planet than to call someone a killjoy. “You killjoy. Joy was just going along, minding its own business, making people happy, and then along came you. Killjoy.”3. Knickers
Fun with words: “He snickers at her knickers and she bickers about his kickers.” Translation: He makes fun of her underwear and she argues about his shoes. Ordinary stuff, really. Why? What did you think we were talking about?4. Kegging
Now we’re talkin’. Kegging is when you brew beer at home and store it in a keg in your basement without the help of the local microbrewery. It’s the process of stashing gallons of fine fermented hops, malt and barley and saving it for when your real friends come over. The cheap stuff stays in the fridge upstairs for the in-laws. That’s kegging, friends. Kind of like hoarding, but with better side effects.5. Kickstarter
Yay! Free money! Kickstarter is, of course, the source for business startup capital. Legend has it that all you have to do is list your brilliant business idea on Kickstarter and you’ll be ready for Wall Street in no time. The reality is less than ideal, though. Not every business gets fully funded, and not all fully funded businesses actually achieve liftoff. So a Kickstarter campaign can sometimes be more like a non-starter.6. Kook
What is a kook? Is it merely a silly person who does innocuous things without meaning to make people laugh? Is it a nut? A crazy person? We prefer to think of a kook as someone put on this planet to tickle our funny bones. Someone here to make us smile and say to ourselves, “Look at that kook!” So tomorrow when you’re out, don’t cause a kerfuffle with your talk about your plans for a kegging Kickstarter campaign. Keep your knickers on, you kook, and don’t be such a killjoy!You Can’t Be Syriass: Tourism
What are these extreme tourists looking for?
It can’t be to escape the heat … ’cause there’s a heck of a lot of heat going down in Syria right now. Sure it is good to have a break … but not of a limb. Even with the government advising citizens not to travel to Syria or neighboring regions, no doesn’t seem to mean no for these hardened globe trotters when it comes to this forbidden fruit. Let us hope that when the one piece covers all lingerie is peeled away that flash of yellow is the succulent banana they anticipated and not a rather moldy old lemon that has been dropped on the floor, gassed, shelled … and is actually a painted grenade.Still, if you must go
and have a blast, here are some undiscovered Syrian hot spots that you might want to check out in. They were discovered but very possibly they have been wiped off the map by now.1. The City
Surprisingly still popular with tourists.
One local source explained, ” The tourists are everywhere. They just don’t know where to hide when the shelling starts. They are painting the town very red indeed.”
When asked if foreigners should stop visiting the region until the conflict resolved itself the source disagreed. ” No. Tourism is more important than ever for business … I am a pie salesman”
Pictured is a typical city center hotel. It may not be as shown in your brochure but it is a credible representation of your hotel when it is finished.
Some hotels still boast pools … although these tend to be green, corrosive or black & on fire.
2. The West Coast
Quieter ….. Deathly quiet in fact. This is a destination that is growing in popularity as you can swim for it. Good for those who like to collect shells and bury their loved ones in the sand. Notable landmarks include those left by bombardment by the US Navy Sea breeze great for dispersing gas.
3. The Hole In The Ground
You might think that because these are all over the place, that you can holiday on the cheap but many holes not affiliated with a registered travel agent lack basic amenities and you are exposed to the elements.
A particular problem being rain, as it is full of shells & missiles. Shortly before a rain of terror, you may see what is locally referred to as a sad sky, which you can identify by fighter jets or a nearby rebel enclave.
It is now time to check into your hole in the ground, invest in a very sturdy hat or shelter under a quality umbrella … that is a house … in another country.
Popular with fleeing former dictators, it is essential to check out of your hole in the ground in plenty of time. Overstaying your welcome at popular times of the year may be viewed harshly and some holes operate a public execution policy for tardy guests.
Of course, you can dig your own hole in the ground and vacation at home, politicians do it all the time … but you won’t get the weather.
4. Caves
A very popular choice.
Less deathy.
All the scorpions you can eat.
Tend only to have VCR technology
Some dinosaurs.
4 Great Questions To Ask Your Nanny
A nanny is one of the best things you could possibly have in life. Someone to look after you when you need a snack or when you aren’t sure where you left your socks. They’re these amazing people who just seem to always be around when you need them, and they never seem to get annoyed with you quite like your parents do.
If you are a parent who is thinking of getting a nanny then you should make sure that you ask them the relevant questions and are good enough to look after your look after your children. Another thing that you could take a look into is getting yourself an au pair, as this way you’ll be employing someone who wants to educate themselves whilst also helping to looking after children. You can find out more about au pairs (and how to apply for them if this is something that you are interested in becoming one) on a site like Cultural Care Au Pair. This is becoming a more popular approach that young people are taking to travel the world, so if this is something that you are interested in doing then you should go for it.
Back to the questions though, as a nanny (or an au paid) you might be thinking that they are just looking after your children so well because they get paid for it? In all fairness you now have a person who is there to help look after you. So now wonder your children like this person. Even with everything that they do, from the child’s perspective do you really think that you’re getting everything you possibly can out of this relationship? We’re guessing not. Unless, of course, you’ve already managed to ask him or her the following questions.
1. Where Do Babies Come From?
Your nanny is definitely the right person to explain this to you. Really. You won’t find anyone else more qualified. Certainly not your parents, friends or that health teacher at school who yelled at you for talking over her when she was trying to talk about some retroductive system … or something. Those people are silly information sources. Your nanny would love to be the one to take over this subject and teach you everything you need to know.2. Why Does My Goldfish Hate Me?
Seriously, what is that fish even doing that he thinks he’s so good that he can’t help you out? You wanted a fish, right? Not a selfish. Your nanny understands just how much that goldfish has it in for you, and she can talk to you about why he can’t think of anything better to do than just swim around in his bowl and eat those little flakes of food you feed him. He hasn’t earned his keep for months, and yet no one else seems to care in the household. Well, we’ll tell you who does care. It’s your nanny. So definitely ask her why.3. Who Stole The Cookies From The Cookie Jar?
The age-old question that no one seems to have an answer to. Your nanny may just be the person to crack the case, though. You know how it seems like she’s got eyes in the back of her head? Well, that’s because she does! I know, it’s shocking but you have to be willing to use her talents to your advantage. She probably wouldn’t even mind showing them off. All she wants to be is an amateur gumshoe detective and figure out who stole those cookies from the cookie jar. Was it you?4. What Is The Point Of Bedtimes?
And why is everyone always talking about them? They don’t really seem to serve a purpose. If you’re not tired, then you’re not tired! No one should be able to tell you that it’s time to go to sleep when you’re simply not interested. This is another question that your nanny will love because she needs more challenges in her life. You’ve likely never done anything wrong in your life, meaning that you definitely need to test her a little more. She’s had it easy, and she’d love to go through a long conversation about why you need your rest to start the day off without feeling like you got run over by a truck.Happy Birthday Bubble Wrap !
Hey Monkey Pickles…. Celebrating 50 years of this wonderful stuff. Goofballs united around the world have been using this stuff for entertaining themselves or playing practical jokes for 50 years. Thank You for the wonderful years of enjoyment Marc Chavannes and Al Fielding. What are some of your favorite things to do with Bubble Wrap?
Article Link: Bubble Wrap 50 years
Go Pop Some: Virtual Bubble Wrap Popping
11 Things You Need if You Are a Member of a Unicorn Fan Club
We all know the Unicorn is the most magical of all mythical animals. They do poop rainbows, after all! So, for all you unicorn fans, we compiled a list of the best Unicorn Gifts we could find. From a unicorn tape dispenser, to a bag of unicorn farts, or a wall-mounted unicorn head, here are our favorites.
$22.99
$11.23 in stock
$29.95
$27.99 in stock
Features
- A MAGICAL DESK ACESSORY: Unicorn-shaped tape dispenser with 2 rolls of rainbow tape
- DIMENSIONS: Measures 6 x 5. 25-Inches
- A MAGESTIC SIGHT TO BEHOLD: Stands proudly on your desk with his golden horn and glorious multi-colored tail and mane
- FOR BIG AND LITTLE KIDS: Suitable for ages 8 and up
- SOMETHING FUN FOR EVERY OCCASION: Entertain friends with hilarious NPW gifts and gadgets that will crack them up
GoFloats Unicorn Party Tube Inflatable Raft
$11.23 in stock
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- FUN IN THE SUN: Enjoy the magic of summer with the fun and affordable GoFloats Unicorn Party Tube
- HUGE SIZE: The tube is a great value measuring at 45 inches wide and 3 feet tall - ideal for swimmers of all sizes and rated at 500+ pounds
- PREMIUM MATERIALS: Made of premium UV treated raft grade vinyl 25% thicker than the competition so you can enjoy a day at the pool, beach, lake, or river
- RAPID VALVE INFLATION: New rapid valve allows 10x faster inflation and deflation compared to traditional valves (2 minutes vs 20 minutes)
Bag of Unicorn Farts (Cotton Candy) Funny Unique Gag Gift for Friends, Mom, Dad, Birthday Girl, Boy
$9.95
in stock
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- Now WIth More Cotton Candy! Funny Unique Gift For All Ages.
- Do You Like To Make People Laugh? Bag of Unicorn Farts are guaranteed to brighten a friend's day.
- Scientific fact: Farts In A Bag Are Funny! The 3oz fruit punch cotton candy is delicious!
- Be Original! The perfect birthday gift, retirement or 2nd Anniversary present. Epic Easter basket stuffer.
- Perfect Present! Creative Stocking Stuffer And Birthday Gift Idea. Funny granddaughter or grandson present.
NPW-USA Unicorn Ballpoint Pen
$5.04
in stock
8 new from $0.99
Free shipping
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- Unicorn-shaped writing pen
- Palm-sized - measures approximately 4.5 inches long
- It has a golden horn and writes in black ballpoint ink
- Black ballpoint ink
- Entertain friends with hilarious NPW gifts and gadgets that will crack them up
LeiOh Decorative Cotton Linen Pillow Shams Square Unique Printed Unicorn Pattern Sofa Throw Pillow Case Cushion Cover 18 x 18 Inches
out of stock
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- Material:high quality cotton linen, soft burlap
- Size:18 inch x 18 inch
- Attractive Pattern printed on the front side,the back is the nature linen color without printing
- This cushion cover has an invisible zipper,and the zipper makes the cover easy to remove
- Note:it doesn't include pillow inserts,it is a only cover
Unicorn Shower Curtain Set by Ambesonne, Pastel Colored Illustration of Several Flying Pony Baby Unicorns in the Air , Fabric Bathroom Decor with Hooks, 70 Inches, Multi
$24.95
in stock
2 new from $24.95
Free shipping
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- Measurements - 69” wide x 70” long. No liner needed. 12 hooks included. Made in Turkey.
- Made from - High quality %100 polyester Turkish fabric material. Water resistant. Non-vinyl. Non-PEVA.
- Easy to use - Machine washable and dries fast. Features vibrant colors and clear image. No fading.
- Adds great perspective - Bold graphics printed with state of the art digital printing technology.
- Designer artwork - Not a common usual shower curtain you can find anywhere. Unique. Genuine. Fun.
WINE OF SACRED PURITY UNICORN WINE HOLDER KITCHEN DECORATION SCULPTURE STATUE
$27.99 in stock
5 new from $27.99
Free shipping
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- This Beautiful Unicorn Wine Holder is Made of high quality polyresin, hand painted and polished
- Add some flair to your kitchen by displaying your wine bottles in this holder.
- This Beautiful Unicorn Wine Holder measures Height: 5.75" Length: 11" Width: 4.75"
- Props in photos are not included with the item
Accoutrements Enchanted Unicorn Bandages
$7.42
in stock
17 new from $6.95
Free shipping
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- Tin Container measures approx. 3-3/4" H
- Includes 15 bandages
- Each bandage measures approx. 3" L x 3/4" W
- Bonus trinket in each tin
NPW-USA Unicorn-Shaped Color Pencil Set, 10-Count
out of stock
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- A RAINBOW OF COLORS: 10 colored pencils in a rainbow of colors stored in a unicorn shaped pencil holder
- DIMENSIONS: Measures 6 x 8 x 2-Inches
- STUART THE UNICORN: Stands up proudly on your desk with a rainbow colored mane and golden horn
- KEEP YOUR DESK MAGICALLY TIDY: With a dash of magic, this charming holder keeps your pencils neat
- UNIQUE & FUNNY GIFTS: Entertain friends with hilarious NPW gifts and gadgets that will crack them up
4-Inch Tall Magnetic PVC Unicorn Head Paper Clip Holder Desktop Organizer
$11.45
out of stock
5 new from $9.86
Free shipping
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Pine Ridge Pink Mystical Unicorn Head Includes Interchangeable Pink Horn - Wall Mount - Beautifully Hand Painted and Crafted Durable Light-weight Polyresin Great For Kids Room
$44.95
in stock
Amazon.com
as of April 15, 2024 11:03 am
Features
- DIMENSIONS: This unicorn wall sculpture measures 12" x 3.5" x 9". 12" Tall from tip of horn to bottom, 3 1/2" Wide, and 9" deep from tip of horn to back.
- PREMIUM QUALITY DECOR: This magical unicorn wall hanging head is made from strong and durable poly resin material which also keeps this unicorn light in weight.
- EASY TO USE: Unicorn Wall Head has a keyhole on the back for simple mounting. Perfect to hang on your wall whether as a lone display or mixed with other decorative items.
- 100% ANIMAL FRIENDLY: Looking just like its real life, this faux taxidermy unicorn head wall hanging features a pink hand painted and crafted interchangeable horn. No animals were harmed in the making of this animal head sculpture.
- HOLIDAY GIFT IDEA: This unicorn wall art home decor is unique and brand new. Offer this unicorn head sculpture to any of your friends or family and show your love and affection to them.