Valentine’s Day Gift Guide

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Valentine's Day Gift Guide, Valentine's Day Gifts for Her, Valentine's Day Gifts for Him

Valentine’s Day Gifts for Her – Gifts She Actually Wants

Not sure what to get your girlfriend/wife/stalker crush for Valentine’s Day? Look no further! We’ve compiled a few V-day gift ideas guaranteed to keep you out of the dog house. Trust us… we know what girls want.

Kitchen-Aid Artisan Stand Mixer

Disclaimer: the Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer is literally the ONLY kitchen-related gift you can give to your lady for Valentine’s Day; anything else is off-limits and considered highly offensive. Got it? That being said, EVERY woman wants a Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer. It’s like the Rolls-Royce of kitchen equipment. Tip: she will want a Kitchen-Aid in a fun color. If you get her a plain one, it’s like you got her NOTHING.

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Beauty and the Beast nail polish minis by Morgan Taylor

Show her you love her as much as you love Emma Watson, you Potterhead you. These limited edition Beauty and the Beast nail polish minis are adorable and will cover anyone’s beastly nails with romantic colors. Throw in a couple of Beauty and the Beast movie tickets and she’ll choose you over Gaston.

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Versace Yellow Diamond Gift Set

Not quite ready to commit with an ACTUAL diamond? This Versace Yellow Diamond gift set is like, the 37th next best thing. Nothing screams “I Love You” like diamonds that are the color of urine. Girls love Versace. It even comes with a heavy-duty key chain for her to chuck at you next time you tell her to wear her pee perfume.

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Fresh Maine Lobster

Did you know lobsters pee from their faces? Now that you are feeling really romantic, we have the perfect gift idea for you. Get some tail! We’re talking about Maine lobster tails, you pervert. Your lady loves to be wined and dined, so get her some humanely-raised Maine lobster, sent straight from the source! We even have an exclusive link for $10 off your order, so get crackin’!

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Rose Arrowhead Bangle

Go with a tried-and-true standby: JEWELRY. Women friggin’ love jewelry, it’s not rocket science. This Rose Arrowhead Bangle is plated with rose gold, and was featured on Instagram. You don’t have to know what any of that means, just know that it means something to your lady friend and you’ll be golden… rose golden! Sorry. We’re just excited for you to be Husband/Boyfriend/Weird Stalker of the Year after you give her this beautiful bangle!

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Valentine’s Day Gifts for Him – Gifts He Actually Wants

Forget roses and chocolates, guys want COOL SHIT, not dead plants and sugar. We’ve got some killer gift ideas that are so amazing, he’ll be singing your praises for months, or at least wipe the toilet seat. Here is our Valentine’s Day Gifts for Him Guide!

Cigar Aficionado’s 10 Best Cigar Kit

For some unknown reason, guys love cigars. It’s an innate, primal desire to inhale garbage. Just accept this fact and get him this Cigar Aficionado’s 10 Best Cigar Kit. It’s based off of a list that Cigar Aficionado (a respected rating and review site for cigars) puts together of their top cigar choices. Whatever. He will also get a cigar cutter and a crazy jet line tornado lighter! He’ll be kissing you with his disgusting cigar mouth in no time.

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The Original Craft Beer Club

We aren’t all lucky enough to live in a craft beer mecca. Or maybe you’re just too lazy to put on pants and make a run to the liquor store. Enter Craft Beer Club. You heard us right, Craft. Beer. Subscription. Way better than a monthly Auto Trader. He’ll be the envy of all his hipster friends!

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Big Shot Custom Bikes

So, your dude likes bikes, or you’d like him to take a long bike ride off a short trail. Either way, Big Shot Custom Bikes are where it’s at. With Big Shot you can choose from hundreds of color combinations to suit your style. Why give him a bike like everyone else? Unless he’s boring. Because then you should dump his boring ass and snag a custom bike for yourself!

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Chicago Steak Company

Girl buys meat. Girl give meat to boy. Boy loves girl forever and ever and ever. The end. Buy him this Chicago’s Best Seller Steak Assortment.

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Roku Ultra

We’ll make this simple, Roku Ultra: SPORTS SPORTS SPORTS OVER 140 SPORTS CHANNELS STREAMING SPORTS SPORTS 4 LYFE.

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