Monkey Business

Are you sick of working for “The Man” ’cause its sexist? Do you try to embrace everyone equally? Is that why there is a restraining order out against you?

Why not start your own business?

There will be less time for troublesome hugging and you might just make your fortune.
It’s The American Dream.

Wake up and start dreaming that dream but don’t get caught dreaming because there are pitfalls and potholes to avoid. Also the wheel has already been invented so … try and avoid that boo-boo.

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As a golden rule, if you wake up inspired to invent a fantastic something that you dreamed about and there is a name for it … grab a few extra minutes of sleep before you go into full production.
So, you’ve decided against inventing water.
Good Job!
But what else should you be aware of when entering the world of business?

Here are 10 Handy Business Tips

1. If you plan to float your company stockpiling corks or helium balloons on site will not help the endeavor. You will just reduce your storage space & people will laugh at you.

2. The Stock Market is not a place where you can exchange ideas or recipes for gravies & sauces.

3. Wall Street is not the hub of the construction district.

4. Understand the term hedge fund. If you run a beauty salon and you are saving up for a hedge then you are probably laboring under a misapprehension.

5. You should already be successful before conduct business by shouting insults at everyone while wearing a ginger cat on your head.

6. When interviewing prospective employees, do not tie them to a chair and shine a light in their eyes.

7. Business mergers do not have to be negotiated as you join the freeway.

8. When promoting an employee don’t waste money on expensive television and social media advertising.

9. Gardening Leave is not vacation time for gardeners

10. It is not necessary to dress up as King Midas when administering a golden handshake.